If you read my blog from two years ago, (When your blackness is questioned, where does that leave you?) you’ll have a glimpse into my story and how I grew up. What I didn’t share was the numerous occasions I have been used as a “token” because of that upbringing. Certain friend groups used me to show they were “down for the people,” I received awards in high school that I did not realize I was nominated for until the opening line of the emcee’s speech was “Sydne is the only black female swimmer on her high school team and makes good grades…,” and my favorite memory of all was getting called down to my activities director’s office a month before school let out for summer vacation to let me know I was nominated to participate in Silver Knight (that I didn’t have a project for… and the application was due the same month we returned to school, psst… there were three other black students in the room with me).
Imagine my surprise when I was sitting in her office with the other black students, who like me, were pulled out of class randomly. We sat in her office with five of our Caucasian classmates, who had been working on their Silver Knight projects since their sophomore and/or junior year and had already begun filling out their applications.
In other words, I had two months to create a project, implement the project, and fill out a 25-page application asking questions like “How did you come up with your project? How many community and service hours did you dedicate toward your project?” But you know what they say, when life gives you lemons, pray that you make lemonade. I hit the ground running; I developed a project based on my passion which was swimming. I’ve always enjoyed teaching children how to swim and teaching about water safety and that’s where inspiration struck. Before schools let out for the summer, I called different elementary schools asking if they were interested in me teaching their students about water safety and best practices.
After a lot of no’s, I finally got one yes. Miami Shores Elementary agreed to have my four-week educational program as one of their activities. I developed literature for children to read, created a coloring book and since I was a drama student, I used my theatrical skills to help the students develop skits on what they learned about water safety and had them put on a show.
I had such a fun time with the children, the teachers and the principal were appreciative. Fast forward to the beginning of the school year, it was pedal to the medal getting my Silver Knight application completed and I did it. Even though I was told last minute about my nomination, I was able to complete a project over the summer, gather all the assets needed for my application, and help children feel safer and more confident around water.
I was extremely excited when my application was chosen for the next phase of the process: the interviews. For two weeks, I studied my application word for word, I had note cards to the standard questions the judges would ask. I felt prepared, I was determined, and I wanted to win (what can I say, I’m competitive.) I entered a reception room full of high school students throughout Miami-Dade County, you can feel the excitement and frenetic energy throughout the room. I sat at the table with my other Silver Knight team and, as anxious as they were, I was surprisingly calm and collected. I knew my application packet like the back of my hand, and the best part was that I had the support of my mom who was more than happy to be there with me.
As the judges’ door opened, my name was called. My heart rate spiked, my palms got sweaty, and my legs were about to give out, but I was ready. As I walked to the judge’s table and sat down, I introduced myself with confidence and the the first judge made a comment “Ms. Vigille, I don’t see how your project fits into this category.” At that moment, I wanted the floor to open and swallow me whole. It felt like my crush pulled my pigtails and called me ugly. I was embarrassed, disappointed, and wanted to crumble and cry. In that moment, my mom’s advice played in my head “No matter what happens, never let them see you sweat.” As Eminem said, “Straighten up little soldier, stiffen that upper lip” and that’s what I did. I kindly remarked, “Did you have a chance to read over my packet?” when the other judges turned red and said, “No” I sweetly replied, “Well allow me to explain why my project best fits this category.”
And so, I did. I only had 10 minutes to convince these judges why my project deserved to go to the next round; I again had to convince others why I deserved to be there. Then it hit me, I wasn’t supposed to be there. I was not viewed as a serious contender, just another box to check for them to say, “See we included them.”
The saddest part is I didn’t realize how many times I was dolled up and placed on display until I began writing this blog. To know, I worked diligently my whole life to show people I am an educated individual fell on deaf ears. All I was, and all I felt I ever would be in the eyes of my counterparts, was an enigma that would prove the prejudice narrative wrong. It was not until I got to college that I truly had the opportunity to explore other skills. I never saw myself as a creative but ended up becoming the assistant photo editor for the FAMUAN (I taught myself photography, how to edit photos, and bought my own DSLR camera), then I was promoted to photo editor (I attended athletic games, conferences, and other speaking engagements) and from there I was promoted to managing editor of the FAMUAN where I tried my hand at writing. The first article I wrote was about colorism and how it’s still practiced today, where my story, “Love the Skin You Are In,” was reshared on Twitter (currently X) by Beyonce’s father.
This was the first time in my life I felt like something more. I could do something more and I could accomplish more. I was no longer the black girl who could swim and get good grades. I was a photographer, editor, and writer; I was no longer a checked box; now I am a force to be reckoned with.
The point of this blog and this month is to take a step back and evaluate how we treat other people from different cultures. The way you solve the “checked diversity box” issue is to stop looking for diversity, instead, you look at the skills people have and what they can achieve. You look for people who work diligently and respect others, and you judge them on their character, morals, and values to see if they align with yours. Then one day, when you walk in the halls of your offices and look around, you will realize you will have different faces of different backgrounds from all colors of the rainbow.
You will smile and realize you’re not only surrounded by a capable team with diverse skill sets but also a team that represents how society should be viewed.